


yours forever, Keji

by stillhangingon



Series: Haikyuu!! Angst Week 2020 [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Cloud Atlas Fusion, Angst with no happy ending, Bokuaka - Freeform, Haikyuu Angst Week 2020, M/M, Suicide, i wrote this months ago and forgot abt it oop, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:53:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27432334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stillhangingon/pseuds/stillhangingon
Summary: Haikyuu Angst Week Day 7: "Goodbyes"Keiji writes a letter to Koutaro.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Series: Haikyuu!! Angst Week 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995205
Comments: 5
Kudos: 11
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	yours forever, Keji

Dear Koutarou,

I watched from afar as your golden eyes--usually filled with so much love and happiness it blinded me at times-- filled with the sheen of sorrow and apprehension. I heard your footsteps ascending the building and I could hear your rushed voice, oh so frantic and energetic as the rest of you, demanding where the strange tall man in the velvet shirt was staying. I hear your gasp as you take in the doorman’s outfit. How suspicious, the man just happened to don on a velvet shirt that curiously looked like the exact one that you gave me-or more precisely- the one that I took from you the day that I left to pursue my dream as a writer.

“To remember you by”, I had said before giving what was to be my last kiss to you.

I listened to the angry and frustrated voices of my neighbors as they were disturbed from their respective businesses by a large muscular man with bright hair and glints of mania in his eyes.

You were always like that Koutarou.

You never really cared about what people thought about you.

You never cared about the people who would give us suspicious glances whenever we walked too close on the sidewalk, our fingers carefully avoiding each other.

You never cared that I had come from a past that has left my body used and broken.

You have loved me through all that. When the world decided that I be given revenge for the life that I had so forcefully taken to escape my personal hell. When I was given that sickness that made me immobile, pale, bruised, and worn to the bone.

When I told you to leave me and live a better life and pursue your passion as a businessman on the other side of the city.

You stayed. You kissed my hand, you held it in your hands like it was as delicate and beautiful as the glass statues behind the art gallery that I used to frequent. The art gallery where my dark eyes met yours and suddenly my life has been washed in colors ever since. 

“You are my love and my life, Keiji. I will never leave what I hold most important to me.”

I had unashamedly cried. I cried because I knew I could never love you the way you love me. Oh how I wish that I could have had the chance to tell you that you were much more important than my life. I cried for the days that were ripped apart from us. And I cried because I realized exactly what must be needed to be done to fulfill it.

Koutarou, you are an extraordinarily smart man. Much smarter than me. By now you must have realized what I have planned to do and I know you will try to stop me. My love, my life, My Koutarou.

I love you and I will never ever forget the wonderful years we have spent together.

And if you feel the same as I do for you, I believe that our love will transcend life and all the boundaries of time.

In our next life. When we meet again, I hope it is under the Tokyo stars still unchanged and constant as from the night we fell in love.

Yours forever,

Keiji Akaashi

**Author's Note:**

> so let's just ignore the fact that I skipped day 5 and 6 yea? ok
> 
> check out my [tumblr](http://jaegerboob.tumblr.com/)  
> and [twitter](https://twitter.com/stillhangingonn)


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